And So I Return

    The reply to the email was swift and abrupt.  I opened it with a lot of hesitation.  It is official that I will be going back to third grade.  I still honestly don't know how I feel.  I would love to have kept the job from last year until retirement (about 5 years).  It was filled with challenge and excitement.  It was - quite honestly - a boat load of work.  Seriously.  But I loved every second of it.  Even the early morning duty in the cold weather.  It was different and kept me on my toes.  I don't do change well, never have, and the way the schedule changed around throughout the year was a challenge.  But I adjusted.  I began last year with a pledge to myself to not complain about one thing at school.  That is not to say my brother who lives with me didn't get a few ear fulls.  I pledged to be positive and cheerful.  I did it too.  I won't say negatives never crept in, but I fought them away diligently.  Now I have to continue this personal challenge this year.
     I guess I thought I didn't know which direction I wanted to go.  But I think I was wrong.  I wanted so badly to continue what I had started last year.  I find myself fighting depression about the move.  I know I must shake this free.  Waking up in the middle of the night thinking about the days ahead is not healthy.  I will make this a wonderful year.  I will try to get a hold of my emotions.  Just not this second, just not today. 

HItting send

     I just hit send on an email to my principal.  Now I wait.  I am not sure what I want to hear.  I loved my years in the classroom.  But this past year has been so very special.  I loved just teaching reading (and math after Christmas).  I loved the small but challenging groups.  I even - gasp! - actually liked working with kindergarten.  It was such a breath of fresh air to do something so different after so many years of the classroom routine.  So now I wait.  I have to know.  I don't want to know. 

A Bit of News

     I am not sure I am ready to write this post.  But hopefully it will be good for me.  I just got off the phone with my principal.  It seems I may be heading back to the other end of the building and back to third grade.   I understand all the reasons.  I even see some good things there, but I have to admit I am fighting to be positive.  I will be positive, but it is not coming easily.  I loved this last year more than anything I can say.  It was awesome - so full of blessings.  I must of said a thousand times "if I can just do this til I retire".  He didn't say it was certain, he is trying to find someone, but it looks pretty clear that is where I will be heading.  I am praying that God will place me where I need to be and then bless me.  I did love the classroom.  I just had fallen in love with this position.  I will keep you posted, but please say a prayer this is going to be a good thing.  I haven't cried yet, but I sort of feel the tears on edges of my day.  This has been such a tumultuous summer already, I sort of feel like laughing that this should happen.  Just one more event of the summer of 2014! 

Still here!

      I really intended to write on a much more regular basis.  I just got so busy and well, you know.  I also tend to post more often on my art blog.  I do promise though with the new addition of some more followers to be more diligent.  Promise.
     Right now, there is not a lot going on - school wise.  I am on summer break and usually I spend a lot of time preparing and planning for the next year, but not so now.  I would.  But I am sort of unsure of my role next year.  Kind of hard to plan.  I am going to be in a resource room much like last year.  I will probably be teaching reading and writing this year instead of reading and math.  I am glad for that - math is not my favorite subject.  I love writing.  I don't know whether I will have an entire classroom during our specials time or pull 15 students like last year.  It is all somewhat confusing.  My hope is that I have a smaller number - 15.  I don't see how I am going to make things work (like I want) with 25 - 30 children.  We will see. . .
      As for this past year, I have had the best year ever.  I am truly sorry I haven't written more about it.  It was delightful.  I learned so much and had so much fun!  It was just what I needed to feel inspired again. 
      Thank you for becoming a follower - glad to have some one to "talk" to.  I will post more about this school year as I learn more.  For now, I hope you are having a wonderful summer and please feel free to leave me some sunshine when you visit!